The autumn is finally here. Leaves are changing their colour from lively green to deadly orange, preparing to fall down and die. Their death has no importance in the never ending circle of life.
I’ve always hated autumn. I guess it’s because everything becomes suddenly a little bit too grey, a little bit too rainy and boring. And the most important reason has been my fear of Death.
Autumn is the saddest season of the year. It’s the time for old lives to leave this world, it’s time for retirement, for calming down, for making the final step and fall to the ground without the slighest noise.
But there is also something beautiful about autumn. Yes, everything dies, but it also takes on the most beautiful colours in order to show us that dying doesn’t hurt. That it’s not a bad thing to die. And I feel like I can finally appreciate it and embrace autumn in all its dying beauty.
Also, as I was walking home yesterday everning, I realised that this was my last autumn in my home town. Wherever I go after high school, I won’t stay here – and so this might be the last time in my entire life that I experience the whole season in here. It’s always been a certainty, this small town with greenery all around you and ugly communistic buildings. It’s been certain for all those 17 years that the next autumn would come, just like the one before, and that I would be here to see it.
But not now. And when you realise that, everything around you suddenly becomes more beautiful, more precious, it all shines in its glory and you feel that strange feeling of nostalgia that is always bound to come together with autumn, hand in hand, and the orangeness surrounding you, just like all those places and buildings you’ve known since you were born, are suddenly very special.
Because you know this is the last time. And there is something very special about endings. As Holden Caulfield would say:
“What I was really hanging around for, I was trying to feel some kind of good-by. I mean I’ve left schools and places I didn’t even know I was leaving them. I hate that. I don’t care if it’s a sad good-by or a bad good-by, but when I leave a place I like to know I’m leaving it. If you don’t, you feel even worse.”
1. HARRY POTTER IN FRENCH
My level of French has finally reached the state when I can read Harry Potter with just a little help of the translator. I was very happy to find out that the French version is much easier for language learners than the original one (but that’s normal, I think – the original book is always the best and the most difficult). It’s quite funny, actually, because I started reading this just a few moments after having finished the last book in English, and so I felt a bit dizzy because of the big change of time. But I just cannot stop re-reading this series all over and over again! I’m a Potterhead through and through, just like Harry is Dumbledore’s man.
2. LESSONS OF LATIN
This year I can finally attend a seminar of Latin at school! I’ve had four lessons so far and I absolutely love it. I tried to learn Latin about three years ago but I stopped after two months as I got lost in the grammar and had no teacher to explain it to me. But now I do! I just love the way Latin looks on paper. And the history it brings back to life!
3. BETWEEN THE BARS BY ELLIOT SMITH
I fell in love with this song right away when I heard it for the first time in Stuck in Love a few years back. Now I listen to it every autumn or everytime I feel nostalgia. I love, love, love this song. I think it’s actually one of my favourite songs of all time.
4. BEFORE I FALL
After seeing this movie, I couldn’t stop thinking about anything else for hours. It’s about a girl who lives another ordinary day of hers, when suddenly she dies together with her friends as they’re heading home from a party. But instead of dying properly, she wakes up to the same day and she dies again – and that keeps happening all over and over again, until she realises what she needs to do. It’s a bit more high-school-drama related than I would like it to be, but the idea of being imprisoned in the day of my death for ages really terrifies me and I find it really interesting. The film is adapted from a book and I can’t wait to read it!
5. PRIDE AND PREJUDICE BY JANE AUSTEN
This month, I read the book for the second time because of my Maturita exams next May. And I must say it really surprised me. I mean, I quite enjoyed the book even the first time, but back then the love between Mr. Darcy and Elisabeth didn’t feel real to me – there was no passion, no sparkle, nothing. And now, after having read it again, I totally disagree – I see everything I couldn’t see before. It’s strange how our opinions can change in different stages of life.
6. MACBETH IN DIVADLO NA ZÁBRADLÍ
Divadlo Na zábradlí is a theatre in Prague and this month, I went for a play Macbeth. And I must say it was awesome. The actors spoke in English, but in a quite retarted one, sometimes they were saying only words, such as ‘tired’ or ‘big blood’. As I see it, they tried to target the topic of language – as rich or posh we may be, we still talk like pigs and act like ones. And the whole adaptation of Macbeth was just great. Modern, yet it contained the same meanings, and the acting skills were wonderful. Loved it.
That would be all for this month, thank you for reading and tell me what YOU loved this month and why. I love recommendations!
ARTICLES I WROTE THIS SEPTEMBER: